'Tis the season to see Charlton.

Heston, that is. They say he’s one bad muthah-… Shut yo’ mouth! I’m just talking ‘bout Chuck… We can dig it!

I was reading with interest Neil Kramer’s post comparing Easter to Passover. One of his categories was “Holiday Movie – Easter vs. Passover”. His notion is that while the Jews had C.B. DeMille’s “The Ten Commandments”, the gentiles have Mel Gibson’s “The Passion Of The Christ”. While I think Neil is one of the best bloggers around, I took umbrage to this. My point is that for Easter movies, you should look no farther than “Ben-Hur”. ‘Nuff said.

What says Easter more than chariot races and lepers? Or Stephen Boyd and his oh so painful death scene, covered in cherry jell-o and croaking and squirming? Now don’t get me wrong – “The 10 Commandments” is a fine movie, and the definitive Passover movie. I would dare say that, pound for pound, it is clearly a much better movie than “Ben-Hur”. Therefore, I must agree that even though I am so white-bread that it hurts, Passover wins - at least in the movie category. So let it be written, so let it be done...

Dig!

B-H is slow (except for the galley scenes and the chariot races). 10-C is pretty much action packed (althought the action is kind of slow, like during the exodus).

B-H stars Stephen Boyd, Jack Hawkins, Haya Harareet and Hugh Griffith. 10-C has Yul Brynner, E.G. Robinson, John Carradine, Yvonne Decarlo, Vincent Price, and the always oiled John Derek.

In B-H, Jesus, Masalla (Boyd) and a few sailors get killed. In 10-C, the entire Egyptian army, lots of slaves and the first born males (twice) get snuffed.

B-H is pretty much made up to the point of the crucifixion. 10-C is Old Testament. And it has the green "creeping death".

I could go on, but to what end?

Not long after “The Ten Commandments” and “Ben-Hur”, Chaz played John The Baptist in “The Greatest Story Ever Told”. Was he typecasting himself in religious films for a reason? Perhaps to court the NRA 2 decades early? But his life took a strange turn in the late sixties. “Planet Of The Apes”, “Beneath The Planet Of The Apes”, “The Omega Man”, and then the piece de résistance – “Soylent Green”. Of course, there were some other movies during those times – “Skyjacked”, “Julies Caesar”, “Antony And Cleopatra” (he played Marc Antony in both – a sub typecast?).

But nothing – NOTHING I TELL YOU – could ever hold a candle to “Soylent Green”. “IT’S PEEEEEOPLLLLLLLEAHHHHH!” Now that’s some movie-makin’.

Mmmmmm… Furniture…